My BF and Crush are Dating!


Have a question about your life? About your family, friends, school? Ask other girls. You never know, or you can ask GZ Advisor. Contact me at If your question is urgent please discuss with a parent, school counselor or other trusted adult. You can also visit our Resources page

My BF and Crush are Dating!

Hi. I'm 17. I'd like to know other girls' opinion but I'm not really sure how to use the girl zone website. I found your email address and decided to tell you straight here about what I'm going through.

I think I'm the type that... I never tell anyone about my secrets because I don't want them to have a clue. I think it's up to the point where I can't take it anymore and I want to tell someone about it. So I looked up in the internet to find a website where I can share my stories to anonymous people.

So here goes... I am in a situation where my crush is asking advice on how to get his crush.. which is my best friend. Even my best friend doesn't know that I have a crush on this guy because she likes him too. So one day this guy posted a picture on instagram and wrote his caption something about love. I texted him and asked him who was the girl, I told him maybe I could help. We talked for hours and finally I got to know that he had a crush on my best friend. My heart broke into pieces but I couldn't do anything. I mean, it wouldn't be wise if I hated on my best friend just because of this.

So the guy and I kinda got close. In between conversations he would ask about my best friend and I would give him tips and advice and tell him that he should confess his love. I only thought, that way he won't know that I have a crush on him. But of course it did hurt at the same time.

So time passed and finally he confessed his love to my best friend. My best friend admitted too, that she had feelings for him. Since then, he wasn't really close to me. We used to text each other until late at night night but now, he's only doing it with my best friend. Usually he starts the conversation but he doesn't do it anymore since he got his girl. Recently, I started the conversation and it ended in a really boring way. I wasn't happy at all. It wasn't even a proper goodbye. I didn't want to say things that were unnecessary because it would look like I'm desperate or unattractive. When I looked at his status, he was online and so was my best friend. I kept on reminding myself that that's it. It's not a problem they're a couple and that's it. But It really hurts to feel jealous and force yourself not to feel jealous at the same time.

Can you tell me something that might cheer me up and tell me what I should do?? I really hope you understand and reply to my email.

Thank you so much!!!



Awe, I’m so sorry girl, that is such a tough place to be in--stuck in the middle! I’m blown away by what an amazing friend you are! You encouraged your crush to tell your best friend about his feelings so the two of them could be happy. This tells me you’ve got a good heart and I hope that cheers you up a bit. :) In this situation, I think you did the right thing. This guy liked your friend and she felt the same way.  

Now, where does this leave you??

I’d like you to work on loving yourself. Might sound weird, but hear me out. There is such a thing as being toooo nice and allowing others to take advantage of you. I don’t want you to find yourself in that position. So, I want you to work on finding a balance. It’s important that you share your feelings, thoughts and opinions. You have worth and value, so share it with the world. If we put ourselves last and suppress our true feelings, we cause ourselves so much stress and unhappiness. Honestly, that’s when bad things happen-we might become depressed or explode. So, NOW is the time to start expressing yourself and most importantly, loving yourself. You took the first step by writing this email. You might also try journaling about your feelings and then start telling people in your life that you trust how you feel.

Now, what’s the best way to get over a guy? Go out and have some fun! Call up your other single girls and hang out, blast some music, and laugh. You deserve it. And trust me, you’ll find a guy who really sees and appreciates you. Sometimes, you just gotta trust the timing of your life. xo

GZ Advisor